*prepares party popper*
*nervously shakes the party popper*
*slowly falls asleep with the party popper*
*has a wonderful night with the party popper*
*gets married to the party popper*
It’s a beautiful evening in February. My wife and I are sitting at the fireplace, when suddenly a terrible image appears on the screen of my computer.
My wife looks at me. As I look in her terrified, cardboard eyes, filled with tears, she takes a deep breath, before saying with her shivering voice “It’s what you’ve always wanted, dear. Do it.” My hands start shaking and a lone tear rolls down my cheek. “I can’t, honey. I’m not like that anymore.” “I will do it.” a small voice behind us says. As I turn around, my eyes cross with my son; our son. “You don’t have to do this, Benedict.” I say, as I hold his hands.
Ignoring what I told him, young Benedict Popper-Are Optional holds my wife’s cardboard body in one hand, and her long, beautiful string in the other. With tears in my eyes, I turn my head away. A loud pop sounds behind me and I watch in terror as I see my wife’s confetti spread across the room.
"It’s what you’ve always wanted, dad…" my son says, putting his small, cardboard hand on my shoulder. "Yes," I say, "but not like this… Never like this…"
what the actual fuck
SOMEBODY IS PLAYING A PIANO AND IT’S MIDNIGHT HERE WHY
UPDATE: I FIGURED OUT THEY’RE PLAYING “MY HEART WILL GO ON”
UPDATE: I JUST OPENED MY DOOR AND YELLED “JACK” THE MUSIC STOPPED AND I CAN HEAR SOMEBODY RUNNING DOWN THE HALL ABOVE ME SHOUTING “ROSE” OMG
CAN I SHIP IT
No, itll sink
The real world.
This is from That’s So Raven, where Chelsea and Raven apply to work at the same clothing shop. Chelsea is white; Raven is black. Chelsea gets the job, despite being utterly horrible at it, while Raven, who has a deep interest in fashion and knows how to handle clothes, does not. The girls find this deeply suspicious, so Chelsea wears a hat with a camera on it and questions the employer. The employer admits what she does in the gif above and Chelsea and Raven submit the footage to a news station.
And THAT is why That’s So Raven is the best TV show ever.